If you are wondering what do for Freshers’ Week, where is good to go during Freshers’ Week or maybe, more specifically, what do for Brighton Freshers’ Week, then you might be in the right place.
But then again, as this is simply Offie Mag’s attempt at some weekly clickbait, you might not be either. Rather than telling you what Freshers Night to embarrass yourself at, we’re here for some extra-curricular advice. This what to do for Freshers’ Week, by people speaking from experience.
Yeah, that’s right. Offie Mag staff is made up of loads of ex-student types who’ve been robbing you of your taxes. Now reduce tuition fees and buy our magazine.
Go to the worst clubs in town, just this once…
Every town has those nightclubs, don’t they?
Those ones that door staff that act as if they don’t want you inside their establishment. Those ones where rugby lads run around naked. Those ones where Gangnam Style still plays.
The sheer conglomerate mass of these clubs means that they will have paid your neoliberal university of choice to house a freshers’ event inside their walls. So go, meet people who also don’t want to be there, and realise that it is these like-minded characters who will be your friends for the next three years. A friendship built off of the anecdote of ‘that time we went to that shit club.’
Drink plenty of water
One thing to definitely do during Freshers’ Week is drinking. The other thing is to drink loads of water to counteract all of that drinking.
The rule is, neck a pint of water either side of your sleep. About to pass out in your new halls? Drink a pint of water first. Just woke up under a table in your new kitchen? Drink a pint of water next.
Repeatedly introduce yourself in the exact same way, over and over again
What’s your name? What do you study? Where are you from?
Nail all this in one sentence and save valuable time that could be used for drinking alcohol that will give you special powers. Special powers that will help you share your new byline with as many people as possible.
Perfect your ‘hello, I met you last night but don’t remember your name’ nod
It’s part-nod and part-smile. It shows that you’re polite enough to say hello without having to small talk your way through a corridor. But be careful, those who you decide to acknowledge will now have to acknowledged for the entirety of your undergraduate degree.
Go to Offie Mag’s JAZZ… in Brighton: Afterhours
Yeah, we’re back at Dead Wax Social.
Hopefully we’ll only be bringing the roof down in a figurative sense, this time. We’ve got all vinyl, all funky local DJs all-night long. It’s only a quid if you happen to go to our debut Jazz event at Patterns on the same night, too.
Ring your parents
Just to ease their worry. Don’t tell them how you threw up in your new sink, just tell them that the people in your halls are nice and you love the wok your mum got you.